I just read an article my sister sent me on “seeking routes to a happier life.” The article talks about various techniques that have actually shown measurable promise in research.
The article mentions that researchers are finding your basic level of happiness can be improved with effort (rather than our all having to just live with whatever the default setting is). That is encouraging.
One of the simplest methods mentioned was to just go to sleep each night thinking about three good things that happened to you that day, and analyzing why they happened. Apparently people are getting good results immediately with this one. I had more of a Woody Allen reaction - vivid anxiety dreams about work (an important announcement is going to be made, I am late for the meeting, I have lost the information, I have gotten on the wrong shuttle bus to get to the building where the meeting is, etc. etc.). I also had an anxiety dream about my husband and his health. So far not so good but I am going to keep it up for awhile because I have a feeling it makes sense. If you focus more on the good things that happen to you, won’t you be more aware of them and won’t this affect your overall mood? I would think so.
Another method mentioned is to savor small pleasures in life, like a hot shower or a good cup of coffee. I know this one works for me if I can just stay in the moment long enough to be aware of the good feelings. Especially a hot shower in the morning can lift my spirits big-time.
The article mentions that researchers are finding your basic level of happiness can be improved with effort (rather than our all having to just live with whatever the default setting is). That is encouraging.
One of the simplest methods mentioned was to just go to sleep each night thinking about three good things that happened to you that day, and analyzing why they happened. Apparently people are getting good results immediately with this one. I had more of a Woody Allen reaction - vivid anxiety dreams about work (an important announcement is going to be made, I am late for the meeting, I have lost the information, I have gotten on the wrong shuttle bus to get to the building where the meeting is, etc. etc.). I also had an anxiety dream about my husband and his health. So far not so good but I am going to keep it up for awhile because I have a feeling it makes sense. If you focus more on the good things that happen to you, won’t you be more aware of them and won’t this affect your overall mood? I would think so.
Another method mentioned is to savor small pleasures in life, like a hot shower or a good cup of coffee. I know this one works for me if I can just stay in the moment long enough to be aware of the good feelings. Especially a hot shower in the morning can lift my spirits big-time.
A third method was practicing random acts of kindness, doing nice things for people. I know I have also felt a surge of well being that way.
A few good happiness quotations for the road:
“Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” - Abraham Lincoln
“All I can say about life is, Oh God, enjoy it!” – Bob Newhart
"Keep a good heart. That's the most important thing in life. It's not how much money you make or what you can acquire. The art of it is to keep a good heart." - Joni Mitchell
“Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.” – Helen Keller
“All sanity depends on this: that it should be a delight to feel heat strike the skin, a delight to stand upright, knowing the bones are moving easily under the flesh.” – Doris Lessing
2 comments:
Interesting thoughts. Thanks for sharing.
That quote from Honest Abe is that much more powerful considering that he suffered from bouts of suicidal depression most of his adult life.
When I volunteered at the Boulder County mental health center, we used the Burns book (that you previously mentioned) as well as other cogitive therapy methods with clients and saw some decent success. And I've come across numerous studies that show that his methods bear out positively when put into action. In fact, his methods have more or less become a mental health community standard for measuring depression and taking a measurable approach to treating it.
For myself, I've tried but struggled with cognitive/behavioral methods. I'm already so hard on myself (which has been one of the precipitating and maintaining causes of my anxiety and occasional depression) that I've had a hard time not using those methods to further beat myself up by trying harder.
Now, I tend to look at mental health issues in the context of personality temperaments. On the Myers-Briggs, I'm an "NF" (intuitive-feeling type) but my feeling function was sorely underdeveloped and so my feelings overwhelmed me in the form of raw emotions. Once I got more practice with my emotions and got away from cognitive-oriented therapies, I started to really improve. NF-types are big into the inner world. So, unsurprisingly, learning to read my dreams and finding a feeling-oriented (non-Buddhist) medidtation practice became very rich and fruitful paths to gratitude, joy, and the kind of self-acceptance that I was lacking. Those methods aren't so measurable (although we are getting there in the technology that can measure the effect of unconscious methods of healing). But "NF"-types don't really care about that empirical stuff as much as we do the felt-sense of the approach and, in fact, often feel invalidated when we have to "prove" our beliefs to others.
I think the cognitive approach has great value--I use many of them every day and I don't know where I'd be without them. And I think, ultimately, the various approaches are pointed towards the same general state of mind/state of grace. The difference lies in their relevance to the varied temperament-based cognitive languages that people speak.
I have also found that the Buddhist concepts (meditation, loving kindness) can be a great comfort. I hadn't fully considered before how totally different these various approaches to achieving peace of mind are. The cognitive approach is, well, so very cognitive and analytical. In some cases it is totally wrong for the problem. I consider all of these concepts part of my "bag of tricks" when I am unhappy, lonely, grief-stricken or fearful. It's good to have several to choose from and to have practiced them so they are there when I need them.
Post a Comment